The Little Min Pin that Could

What a crazy week we have had around the Wilkison house!  Last Thursday, I took our dog to the kennel so that we could go to Missouri.  On Friday, she had a seizure while she was there.  I was supposed to pick her up on Monday and the vet was going to talk to me about the seizure then because he knew it would ruin my weekend if he called me in Missouri.  Well, Brady came home for the weekend and he went to pick Baby up a day earlier than planned.  Upon bringing her home, he discovered that something was terribly wrong with her.  She couldn't walk, and she wasn't interested in eating.  She was disoriented and confused.  He called me to let me know about it right before we boarded the plane to come home.

For a long time, I have been worried because Baby is quite elderly.  I thought we had a few more years with her, though, because she is so spunky.  When we got home at almost midnight on Sunday evening, Brady came out to meet us in the garage.  He wanted to warn me about what I was going to see, and to let me know that Baby was probably going to die.  He was right about her condition.  As soon as I saw her, I could tell she was not her normal, feisty self.  She wouldn't move from her bed at all and didn't seem to care when I came home.  Brady told me that she wouldn't even leave the bed to go to the bathroom and he had given her a bath to clean up the mess. When she did walk, she did it in a Popeye manner, with her legs twisted inward.  I went to bed, and I thought that she probably wouldn't be there when I woke up in the morning.  She was still alive in the morning, but just barely hanging on. 

I hugged her before I left and told her how much I loved her.  Randy was home, and he agreed that he would call the vet.  The vet told Randy that it was only a matter of time until Baby passed away.  As hard as it was to say, I told Randy at lunch that I thought he should have her put to sleep that afternoon.  She was so ill and weak, that it wasn't fair to make her live.  He reluctantly agreed that he would take her if that was what I really thought was best.

After I left, Brady dug her a grave in the backyard by the aspen trees.  Then, he and Randy took her to the vet's office.  No one was up at the front desk, so they had to sit and wait.  All of a sudden, Baby perked up and wanted to get down and walk around and smell people.  The guys decided that this, along with the fact that no one was at the front desk, was a sign from God to leave!  When I got home, Randy and I decided to wait it out another day and see if she continued to refuse to eat and drink.  We hugged her and gave her lots of love that night, as we thought she would probably die the next day.

The next morning, after Randy left for work at 5:30, I came back into the house.  Baby was standing up by her food dish, looking at me as if to say, "Well, where's my breakfast?"  So, I put a scoop into her dish.  To my complete shock, she ate some of it and drank water!  Since then, she has improved every day and now you would never know that she faced the executioner on Monday. 

I know that Baby's time will come--and probably sooner rather than later.  But, I am so glad that the Great Governor in the sky gave her a stay of execution.  Until she dies, I will appreciate every extra day that I have been given with her and I will look out the window at the little grave under the tree and thank God that it is empty for now.

Zig Ziglar--Save Me Please!

I think all of this change in my life is getting to me.  I have been feeling pretty overwhelmed lately, and wish that I could just live out the rest of my life on an island, sipping iced tea and reading novels.  But, things are never simple.  I am not trying to be a Negative Nelly, but I feel so  out of control.  I want immediate solutions to all of my issues, and I want everyone to be happy all of the time and never have any troubles.  Especially my three babies.  When they were little, I was in control of everything they experienced.  I realize that part of letting them go is to allow them to make their own decisions in life, and ultimately, recover from their own mistakes.  But, I hate to see them hurting when they do, and I want to fix it.   Everyone around me just needs to realize that life would work out so much better if they would do it my way! ( Ha-we all know that's not true). I so desperately want to be in control of life--theirs and mine--and I am really not in control of anything--except, perhaps, my attitude!

Admittedly, my attitude has been awful lately.  Part of it is because I am in a new place in my life, and I feel like I am finding myself all over again.  Some of this experience has been wonderful.  Randy and I are having a great time together, and we still have a lot in common.  My house is rarely messy any more--gotta love that!  The grocery bill has been drastically reduced due to a lack of teenage boys in my house.  These things are all great.

I need to get back to being Pollyanna   I miss that part of myself.  But, I feel that life is trying so very hard to drag me down mentally.  I have to fight with everything I have to get rid of this horrible disease that is pervading my brain!  So, in an effort to improve my attitude, I rediscovered a favorite speaker/author of mine--Zig Ziglar!  Now, you may ask yourself, just who is this strangely named man?  He is a Christian motivational speaker who talks a great deal about how important it is to have a positive attitude.  People often notice my extreme optimism(usually--not right now), and I attribute this optimism to Mr. Ziglar and trying to do as he has instructed me.

Yesterday, I downloaded a book of his onto my Kindle.  I am reading it, and making note cards to look at several times a day.  I want my good attitude back, and I will fight for it!  Life is too short to be a Debbie Downer.  All of this time that I spend worrying and being upset about my lack of control is wasted time that can never  be regained.

Here are my lovely children, just a few years ago... Aren't they gorgeous?!?